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Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Blogging Returns January 5th

I hope to have everything up and ready to go on January 5th. I'll resume blogging then!

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Your Ticket to History

Barack Obama is offering ten people the chance to go to Washington DC to see his inauguration. Of course, you have to give him money, first. However, it's a better payoff than a calendar or something. Just click on the photo to the left and enter to win!

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Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Santa Bail-out Hearings

Another classic from Funny or Die

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Friday, December 19, 2008

Radio City Music Hall Speaker Series 2009

Thought I'd take a break from taking a break from blogging to offer discounted, not available to the public, tickets (available only with this blog's special code! really!) to the Radio City Music Hall Speaker Series for next March. Here's the info:

March 9: Bill Maher & Ann Coulter
March 31: Anderson Cooper Interviewing Arianna Huffington, DL Hughley and Mike Huckabee
April 20: Janet Reno, Alberto Gonzales, & John Ashcroft
May 26: Charlie Rose interviewing James Carville and Karl Rove

Just click HERE and use the code: ISSUES.

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Thursday, December 18, 2008

Breaking for the Holidays

I'll be taking a break from blogging for the holidays. I'm hoping to retool the website and get it a little more focused for next year. Thanks for visiting!

(Of course, if Sarah Palin stands in front of another turkey getting slaughtered I'll have to blog that!)

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The Price is Exactly Right



From the Huffington Post:

A contestant on "The Price is Right" beat the odds this week to guess the price of his Showcase Showdown EXACTLY right. It was the first time in almost 30 years that that happened. If one is within $100 without going over, you win both of the showcases, which he did and then took home over $56,000 in prizes.

Sad for his fellow contestant though, as she did a normally-remarkable under-$500 difference guess for her showcase. She clearly thought she had it in the bag before his perfect bid was revealed. Host Drew Carey apparently wasn't as impressed.

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Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Daily Show: Best John McCain Moments

While we're all awaiting the return of the Daily Show next year, you can enjoy the Best of John McCain:

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Videos Inspired by Shoe Throwing Incident

Lots of people are making fun of President Bush having a shoe thrown at him. So here are some of the best videos (and ones not related, but funny about shoes anyway). Enjoy.





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CNN: Shoes v. Bush Parodies

Gotta love Jeanne Moos...

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Monday, December 15, 2008

Barney's Christmas

Michael Phelps makes an appearance in the traditional Christmas video about the President's dog, Barney. Even that star turn can't really spice up this video.

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Sunday, December 14, 2008

SNL: Really!?! Governor Blagojevich

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Iraqi Man Throws Shoes at Bush

Pretty good reflexes by President Bush here... Based on those ducking reflexes, I don't believe this is the first shoe ever thrown at President Bush. Am I right, Laura? I can't believe the Daily Show won't be on until January.



From CNN:

A man identified as an Iraqi journalist threw shoes at -- but missed -- President Bush during a news conference Sunday evening in Baghdad, where Bush was making a farewell visit.

The shoe-thrower -- identified as Muntadhar al-Zaidi, an Iraqi journalist with Egypt-based al-Baghdadia television network -- could be heard yelling in Arabic: "This is a farewell ... you dog!"

While pinned on the ground by security personnel, he screamed: "You killed the Iraqis!"
read more.

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Friday, December 12, 2008

Michael Phelps on Colbert

He even seems overly competitive in this interview. I wouldn't want to play a board game with Phelps. You might get the Parcheesi board thrown at your head.

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McCain on Letterman: "I Don't Want to Talk about the Bleeping Campaign"





Hope to have the full interview posted later today.

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Thursday, December 11, 2008

Daily Show: Holiday Wrap-Up

The Daily Show is going away until the start of next year. Happy Christmas!

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Trailer: Terminator: 'Salvation'

I've never watched an entire Terminator movie, so I've got no business saying "Hey, this looks good!" but I will anyway. Plus, you can't beat Christian Bale.

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Daily Beast: Who Said It? Tony Soprano or Rod Rod Blagojevich?

The Daily Beast tests your knowledge of the Sopranos and the Blagojevich indictment:

Hands on buzzers: One's a trash-talking thug trying to stay one step ahead of the law. The other was played by James Gandolfini. Can you identify the speaker of the ten quotes below?

1. "Unless I get something real good...shit, I'll just send myself, you know what I'm saying."

2. "What the fuck am I, a toxic person or something?"

3. "Log off, that "cookies" shit makes me nervous!"

4. "They're not willing to give me anything except appreciation. Fuck them."

5. "You got no fuckin' idea what it's like to be number one. Every decision you make affects every facet of every other fucking thing."

6. "I've got this thing and it’s fucking golden, and I'm just not giving it up for fuckin' nothing. I'm not gonna do it. And I can always use it. I can parachute me there."

7. "That motherfucker's full of shit. He's shaking me down."

8. "Our recommendation is fire all those fucking people, get 'em the fuck out of there..."

9. "I could have made a larger announcement but wanted to see how they perform by the end of the year. If they don't perform, fuck 'em."

10. "Jesus Christ! The money I've been dropping in here, I could've bought a fuckin' Ferrari."

Answers:
Tony Soprano: 2, 3, 5, 7, 10
Governor Blagojevich: 1, 4, 6, 8, 9

Maybe HBO can give us a new spin-off series: Tony Soprano gets elected Governor of Illinois. Carm then asks Tony to get her appointed to a corporate board because she says she has a background in real estate and appraisals. Oh, wait, that's Blagojevich's wife who allegedly said that. Next we'll find out that Blagojevich's daughters are trying to become doctors and his sister, a gay rights activist, is trying to shake him down for money.

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Daily Show: Jason Jones' Revealing Interview with Blagojevich

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Daily Show: Rod Blagojevich's Troubles



Stewart on 50% of the last 8 Governors of Illinois ending up in jail: 50% of all Illinois Governors end up in jail. For God's sake, did you know, this is true, that only 48% of the people who commit murder end up in jail for their crime. You are more likely to end up in jail if you become the Governor of Illinois than if you become a murderer.

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Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Hilarious Carrie Fisher Interview

Carrie Fisher on the Today Show. She certainly doesn't look like the Princess Leia on the left any more (think Karen Allen in Indiana Jones 4) but she's sharper, edgier and funnier than ever. She talks hysterically about her mother and father (the Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston of yesteryear) Debbie Reynolds and Eddie Fisher, her drug abuse and her failed marriages. Plus, she says she never would've done Star Wars if she'd known it would make her famous.



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Daily Show: Stewart Debate Huckabee on Gay Marriage



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Daily Show: Rod Blagojevich is a Jagoff



Stewart on Blagojevich: Clearly this man has nothing to hide except perhaps whatever is written on his forehead. My guess is it's something like, 'bribe me.' Can [he] make it any easier [by saying he wasn't going to give the Senate seat away for free]? Said the governor, quote, I would like to sell this Senate seat to the highest bidder, clearly violating US Code Title 18 part 1 chapter 11, section 208 paragraph a, solicitation of bribery.

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Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Colbert Applauds Congresswoman who Hung up on Obama



You can hear more from the Congresswoman about why she hung up on Obama HERE.

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The Card McCain Left in the Deck

GMA releases a Reverend Wright ad prepared by McCain's campaign, one that was never released.

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IL Governor Called Obama "Motherf***er"

The saga of the arrested Illinois Governor continues...

In case you were wondering if Obama offered any incentives to Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich to appoint his long time friend Valerie Jarrett to the Senate, that would a big, NO. To which Blagojevich replied, "Fuck him."

From Ben Smith:
The tapes reveal a two-term governor who no longer wants his job, badly wants cash and is determined to leverage a financial benefit out of his appointment powers.

He also appears to think little of the president-elect, whom he calls a "motherf***er" at one point.

“F**k him,” Blagjoveich says of Obama during a lengthy call with top aides and his wife recorded on November 10th, “For nothing? F**k him.”

In another section of the complaint, Blagojevich expresses exasperation that Obama and his team aren't willing to offer him an inducement in exchange for appointing an aide, apparently Valerie Jarrett, to the Senate.

Blagojevich "said he knows that the President-elect wants Senate Candidate 1 for the Senate seat but 'they’re not willing to give me anything except appreciation. F**k them,'" says the complaint.
Obama has managed at every step to avoid the Chicago politics as usual. Pretty impressive.

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Illinois Governor Arrested - Trying to Sell Obama's Senate Seat

From the Holy Shit Department at CNN:

Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich is in federal custody on corruption charges, a law enforcement official said Tuesday.

Blagojevich and his chief of staff, John Harris, are charged with conspiracy to commit mail and wire fraud and solicitation of bribery, according to a statement from the U.S. Attorney's office for the Northern District of Illinois.

Federal prosecutors say Blagojevich, Harris and others conspired to gain financial benefits in appointing President-elect Barack Obama's Senate replacement, according to the statement.

"The breadth of corruption laid out in these charges is staggering," U.S. Attorney Patrick Fitzgerald said in a statement. "They allege that Blagojevich put a 'for sale' sign on the naming of a United States Senator; involved himself personally in pay-to-play schemes with the urgency of a salesman meeting his annual sales target; and corruptly used his office in an effort to trample editorial voices of criticism."

According to the statement, Blagojevich is alleged to have discussed obtaining:

  • a substantial salary for himself at either a non-profit foundation or an organization affiliated with labor unions;
  • a spot for his wife on paid corporate boards, where he speculated she might garner as much as $150,000 a year;
  • promises of campaign funds -- including cash up front;
  • a Cabinet post or ambassadorship for himself.
  • The Obama transition team is aware that Blagojevich is in federal custody, but has no comment, according to a senior Democratic source.

    Blagojevich, Harris and others are also alleged to have withheld state assistance to the Tribune Company in connection with the sale of Wrigley Field. The statement says this was done to induce the firing of Chicago Tribune editorial board members who were critical of Blagojevich.

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    Daily Show: Matthew Alexander



    Stewart talks with Matthew Alexander, author of "How to Break a Terrorist: U.S. Interrogators who used brains not brutality to take down the deadliest man in Iraq."

    Support this blog and buy the book through the link below.

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    Monday, December 8, 2008

    Daily Show: President Goofus and President Gallant



    Stewart on Obama taking office: Do we really have to wait until January 20th? Can't we have him already?

    Stewart on President Bush saying "Welcome to my hanging" at the unveiling of his new Presidential portrait: Is it possible his entire administration has been a setup to that joke?

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    Video: Bush-Streisand Share Awkward Kiss



    From WCCO:

    Barbra Streisand got an awkward kiss on the cheek from the president, and yes, she gave him a smooch back.

    Streisand, a vocal critic of President George W. Bush, was a guest Sunday at the White House just before one of Washington's few A-list events: the Kennedy Center Honors.

    "Art transcends politics this weekend," the longtime Democrat said beforehand. Still, she said it would have been "lovely" if she could have received the award while President-elect Barack Obama was in office.

    The hug and kiss between Bush and Babs — who has previously said Bush's election wins in 2000 and 2004 were stolen — was replayed later on video at a Kennedy Center gala. The crowd couldn't help but laugh.

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    Olbermann: "Prop 8" the Musical

    Keith Olbermann interviews the stars of "Prop 8" the musical.

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    Sunday, December 7, 2008

    SNL: Obama Plays It Cool

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    SNL: Hillary is Back!

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    Thursday, December 4, 2008

    Understatement of the Year

    And the award goes to... Britney Spears in Glamour magazine:

    "I notice that if there are some times I've been stressed ... that affects your kids," she says. "So you have to make sure you're a happy mom so they can be happy."

    Well, at least she finally figured it out.

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    Mattel Plays Grinch: Gets Judge to Ban Bratz

    Sure, they're on the right side of the law (arguably), but is it really in the Christmas spirit to dash all hopes of little girls everywhere who wanted a Bratz doll for Christmas?

    "Sorry, honey, Santa had to stop making the Bratz doll because he developed the concept while he was working at Mattel and then sold the idea to another company. Those elves just weren't allowed to make the Bratz dolls. Only Mattel elves can make them."

    From CNN:
    The rowdy Bratz dolls have been evicted. Barbie has regained control of the dollhouse.

    Toy giant Mattel Inc., after a four-year legal dispute with MGA Entertainment Inc., touted its win in the case Wednesday after a federal judge banned MGA from making and selling its pouty-lipped and hugely popular Bratz dolls.

    "It's a pretty sweeping victory," Mattel attorney Michael Zeller said. "They have no right to use Bratz for any goods or services at all."

    U.S. District Judge Stephen Larson rocked the toy industry with his order that MGA must immediately stop manufacturing Bratz. He allowed MGA to wait until the holiday season ends to remove the toys from store shelves.


    I don't think there will be any Bratz dolls left to buy after Christmas. Looks like Tickle Me Elmo will be replaced this year by the Bratz doll as the most sought after toy. Buy 'em while you can!

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    Daily Show: The Bush Exit Interviews

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    Daily Show: Worst Christmas Present Ever

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    Congresswoman Hangs Up on Obama. Twice.



    From the Department of "Who Is Dumber than Sarah Palin?" Gawker reports:


    Meet Ileana Ros-Lehtinen, an inept Republican politician on the order of, say a Katherine Harris. The Congresswoman hung up on Barack Obama twice today, and then put out a press release about it, and THEN mis-spelled "Barak's" name (and the name of his chief of staff) in the press release. Surely what's going on here is that Ros-Lehtinen, the longest-serving woman in Congress and no stranger to embarrassment, has learned all too well the apparent lesson of Sarah Palin's crank call from fake Nicolas Sarkozy: Dense politicians should not attempt to talk to famous strangers on the phone. But she's still incredibly stupid, as revealed by the hilarious chronology of events she published today:
    • "Ros-Lehtinen received a call on her cell from a Chicago based phone number and an aide informed her that President-Elect Obama wished to speak to her. "A gentleman sounding like Obama introduced himself when Ros-Lehtinen cut him off and said that 'I’m sorry but I think this is a joke from one of the South Florida radio stations known for these pranks' "and hung up.
    • "Cong. and Chief of Staff designate Rahm Emmanuel (sic) called Ileana and stated 'Ileana, I cannot believe that you hung up on the President-Elect.' Ros-Lehtinen told Rahm that she didn’t believe the call was legitimate"and hung up on Emmanuel (sic).
    • "A staffer to the Congresswoman informed her that Chairman Howard Berman of the Foreign Affairs Committee needed to speak with her urgently. When Chairman Berman called, Ros-Lehtinen urged him to recount a story only both of them would know [emphasis added], which he did, and told her that she had indeed hung up on the President-Elect."
    Then Obama called this insane lady again, telling her "it is very funny that you have twice hung up on me," by which he meant, "please tell me what you would like to see happen in Cuba, so that I know how not to conduct diplomacy there, because you sure suck at that kind of thing."

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    Wednesday, December 3, 2008

    Prop 8 - The Musical

    See more Jack Black videos at Funny or Die


    From the Huffington Post:
    The hilarious people at "Funny of Die" have put out a new video, "Prop 8 - The Musical." The star-studded participants include Jack Black, Neil Patrick Harris, Margaret Cho, John C. Reilly, Maya Rudolph and many more familiar faces.

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    Daily Show: Team America



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    Tuesday, December 2, 2008

    Hitchens Goes After Hillary

    I love watching Christopher Hitchens relentlessly bringing up all the Clintons crap. Of course, it would be nice if Obama had avoided it altogether by steering clear of them.

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    Oliver Stone's "P"



    Via Andrew Sullivan.

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    Daily Show: MSNBC Replaces FOX News

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    Monday, December 1, 2008

    10-year-old Wants Obama Interview

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    Mental Recession Named Real Recession

    Despite Phil Gramm's assertions that we were all just suffering from some sort of mental problem, the National Bureau of Economic Research said today we are in fact in a recession and have been in one since December 2007. From CNN:
    It typically takes a long time after the start of a recession to declare its start because of the need to look at final readings of various economic measures.
    "The committee views the payroll employment measure, which is based on a large survey of employers, as the most reliable comprehensive estimate of employment," said the group's statement. "This series reached a peak in December 2007 and has declined every month since then."

    Employers have trimmed payrolls by 1.2 million jobs in the first 10 months of this year. On Friday, economists are predicting the government will report a loss of another 325,000 jobs for November.

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    Hillary Becomes Obama's Secretary of State

    Obama also keeps Robert Gates on as his Secretary of Defense.



    From MSNBC:

    Obama also named Washington lawyer Eric Holder as attorney general and Arizona Gov. Janet Napolitano as homeland security secretary. He also announced two senior foreign policy positions outside the Cabinet: campaign foreign policy
    adviser Susan Rice as U.N. ambassador and retired Marine Gen. James L. Jones as
    national security adviser.

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    Wednesday, November 26, 2008

    Happy Thanksgiving

    This is from "Christmas Story" but I think it applies to Thanksgiving dinner as well. May yours be just as merry. No posts until after the holiday.

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    Real Estate Downfall



    Here's a side of Hitler you don't always get to see.

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    Tuesday, November 25, 2008

    Who Is the President?

    Not that I mind him taking over, but I find it amusing that Obama is acting much more Presidential and just sort of taking over the job while President Bush seems content to let it happen.

    Obama held another news conference today to announce more of his economic team and to announce more economic decisions. He could've been economical and done all this in one day, but I get the sense he wants to be seen as out in front of this before he gets into office (duh) so that he can hit the ground running.

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    Palin on Turkey Slaughter: "No Worries"

    I promise there will be a reprieve from the turkey slaughter talk in time for Thanksgiving, but this is just funny.

    Palin denies that she knew what was going on in the background during the interview, but the photographer has a different story. From Andrew Sullivan:

    Scott Jensen is the one who filmed the scene. He’s local station KTUU’s award winning chief photographer. He told CC from KUDO radio yesterday that Sarah Palin, who was standing next to her personal assistant throughout the entire interview, chose the spot on which she stood for the “turkey slaughter interview” that quickly went viral on the internet, and received wide coverage in the news media. The turkey slaughter was already underway when the governor chose the spot. The photographer pointed out what was going on and asked her if she wanted to move. She said, “No worries.”

    But Palin is now denying all of it, and implicitly calling the photographer a liar:

    “The [Alaska] governor did not know it was going on behind her,” Palin’s spokesperson tells ET of the reportedly grisly scene at Triple D Farm & Hatchery outside Wasilla. Cameras captured Palin extending the annual Thanksgiving pardon to one turkey while a farm hand slaughtered the bird’s feathered friends in the background.

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    Olbermann and the Unblurred Palin Turkey Video

    Olbermann watches the Palin turkey video (unblurred - so watch out) for the first time live on Countdown last night. Olbermann mixes in the class WKRP Turkey drop episode and adds this classic line to sum up Palin's faux pas: "As God as my witness, I thought turkeys could fly."



    Video: Jed Report

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    Monday, November 24, 2008

    Obama Names Economic Team

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    Daily Show: Best Sarah Palin Moments

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    Sunday, November 23, 2008

    SNL: Bill Comments on Hillary's Appointment

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    SNL: A Message from Rahm Emmanuel

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    SNL: Turkey Run

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    Friday, November 21, 2008

    Palin the Turkey Killer

    Update: MSNBC reports that Palin says she was aware of the massacre, that several turkeys were slaughtered during the interview, and no she wasn't bothered by it. True story.

    -Original Post-

    Greatest turkey killing video ever. (No, I don't advocate the slaughter of innocent animals, just the humiliation of not so innocent politicians). Palin with the money quotes to help the video. She says, she's always in charge of the turkey and "this was neat ... you need a little bit of levity in this job. Certainly we'll probably invite criticism for doing this too, but at least this was fun." Too true. Props for this moment in history go to the cameraman for not changing the shot and the turkey slaughter guy for daring to do it right on camera.



    From CNN:
    But former Republican VP candidate Sarah Palin is causing a stir for an interview she gave after pardoning an Alaska turkey Thursday, during which one bird was being slaughtered in the background.

    Palin appeared unaware of what was going on directly behind her, though she did seem to take a glance at the unfortunate event at one particular point during the interview.

    "It's nice to support a local business and just participate in something that isn't so heavy handed politics that invites criticism," Palin said during the interview. "Certainly will probably invite criticism for even doing this too, but at least it was fun."

    "I am always in charge of the turkey so I am where I need to be today to prepare for that," she also said.


    hat tip: my dad

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    Daily Show: Dude, Where's my Car Industry?

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    Thursday, November 20, 2008

    Daily Show: Iraq Surrenders

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    Couric Talks Palin Interview on Letterman



    From the Huffington Post:

    Couric said that Palin may have gotten tripped up because she was not
    prepared to answer more general questions during their interview following her
    visit to the UN.

    "I started by asking her who most impressed her as Vice
    President and why, what was the best and worst things Dick Cheney had done as
    Vice President, why was Roe v. Wade an ill-conceived or a bad Supreme Court
    decision," Couric told Letterman. "And I think she really hadn't anticipated
    those kinds of questions, so I think it might've thrown her off a bit. And then
    we got into foreign policy — because, after all, she was at the UN meeting with
    world leaders — and clearly she was struggling with some of those answers."

    While Couric did note that, in Palin's defense, they were not easy
    questions to answer, Letterman reminded her that the "What newspapers and
    magazines do you read?" question was an easy one that Palin blew. Couric
    explained how it came about and said that she disagrees with the way Palin is
    characterizing the question in post-election interviews.

    "We we doing
    one of these walk-and-talks, it was a casual part of the interview, and I just
    said, 'I'm curious, what do you read? What has helped you shape your worldview?
    What do you read to stay informed?'" Couric explained.

    "A good question
    but an easy question," Letterman said.

    "It was just really something I
    was curious about," Couric said, "and I'm not sure whether she was afraid to
    offend certain people, if she would offend conservatives by saying she read the
    New York Times....Even in the post-election interviews, Dave, that she's done,
    nobody's really asked her, 'Why didn't you answer that question?' She claims
    that I said, 'What do you read up there in Alaska?' as if people in Alaska don't
    read or don't have access to reading materials. I never said that. I'm aware
    people in Alaska have access."


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    Daily Show: Talking Andrew Jackson

    Why the editor of Newsweek thinks Barack Obama is like Andrew Jackson. In only one way: both their supporters think they walk on water. It's also a great look at one of the most fascinating characters in American history.

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    Daily Show: Obama Merchandise

    Lewis Black returns with a look at Obama merchandise already up for sale, including Obama condoms.

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    Wednesday, November 19, 2008

    Biden Gets Cupcakes from Obama

    Barack Obama, newly elected President of the United States, went out of his way to lavish a birthday surprise on Joe Biden today. Or at least he could've. Instead, he bought a dozen cupcakes, slapped some candles on them, and called it good. From Huff Po:

    Biden's birthday is Thursday, but Obama surprised his No. 2 after their weekly lunch Wednesday at the transition office in Chicago. According to staff, Obama presented Biden _ a Delaware senator with decades of foreign policy experience _ with a dozen cupcakes decorated with candles and teased, "You're 12 years old!"

    Staff reported that Biden, ever astute in the art of politics, laughed at the his boss's joke. He responded: "Maybe in dog years!"

    Obama led the rest of the staff in song, then handed over some Chicago-themed gifts: a White Sox cap, a Bears cap and a bucket of Garrett's popcorn, a hometown favorite.

    Lame! What's up with that? I've seen office parties with better desserts than that!

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    Daily Show: CNN's Magic Wall Conspiracy Thriller

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    Daily Show: Obama's Team of Rivals

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    Tuesday, November 18, 2008

    Palin's Doodles Revealed

    CNN's Jeanne Moos takes a humorous look at what Palin's doodling means.

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    Colbert Mad at GMA

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    Christopher Hitchens: Hillary as SOS "Ludicrous Embarrassment"

    Christopher Hitchens echos the concerns of many Obama supporters, I among them, over Hillary becoming Secretary of State, on Hardball. For a woman who notoriously lied about her foreign policy experience, this seems like a, well, ludicrous embarrassment.



    From the Huffington Post:
    Christopher Hitchens appeared on "Hardball" Monday night and voiced his strong opposition to Hillary Clinton being named Secretary of State.

    Appearing with Peter Beinart of Time, who is for Clinton's appointment, Hitchens said, "This is the woman who played the race card on Obama... This is the woman whose foreign policy experience consists of making a fool of herself and fabricating a story about Bosnia."

    He also brought up the Clintons' overseas fundraising connections and called the idea of Hillary Clinton as Secretary of State a "ludicrous embarrassment."

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    Daily Show: The G20 Summit

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