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Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Daily Show Video: McCain's Uncomfortable Sex Moment

Stewart on all the news they missed while on vacation: Brangelina had babies, twins! And you know what they named them? Jennifer and Aniston. Not to be mean. They were not trying to be mean, they just like the names.

You got Jesse Jackson threatening to castrate Barack Obama. That, we'll get to.

On Iraq's President handing out cash on the streets of Baghdad: We're going broke over here and this guy is pulling a Sinatra at the Sands!

Stewart on Phil Gramm's "Nation of Whiners" comment:
In the case of Senator John McCain his surrogates job: to ease voters concerns over traditional Republican weak spots like the economy. When people are suffering the GOP can occasionally appear callous, dismissive of real people's needs while seemingly unwilling to lend a helping hand to regular folks because they're too busy cupping Exon's balls. So, they send out people like Phil Gramm, John McCain's chief economic adviser to talk to an editorial board like the one at the Washington Times to let Americans know John McCain, "feels their pain." (Cut to Gramm's "Nation of Whiners" comment)You can read more about the Phil Gramm influenced McCain plan to fix the economy in his new position paper, "Walk it off, America. My 10 point plan for you pussies to learn to suck it up." Phil Gramm's comment is offensive in two ways. One, it's insensitive and two, how does an economic expert not understand that most of our whining jobs have already gone to India.

Stewart on McCain's Uncomfortable Sex Moment: After something like that, the McCain campaign needs another surrogate to go out and kill off the first surrogate. So here we go, former CEO of Hewlett Packard Carly Fiorina. (Cut to Fiorina saying Gramm will no longer be speaking for McCain). In your face, Gramm! Carly Fiorina will be talking for John McCain from now on! Not just about economic issues, but about issues that are important to women like last Wednesday when she said, "There are many health insurance plans that will cover Viagra but won't cover birth control medication. Those women would like a choice." She speaks for you, right, John McCain? (Cut to McCain flabbergasted over question that women should be able to choose birth control)(best video I've ever seen of a candidate at a loss for words!) Now you know what it's like to get the birds and the bees talk from John McCain.

On Jesse Jackson "whispering" that he wants to cut Obama's nuts off: Yes, it turns out if you're in a television studio and you're miked and you don't want anybody to hear what you say, all you have to do is whisper. My favorite part of the clip? Is after he does the I wanna cut his nuts off thing: he does the little gesture.

When you've been gone two weeks and this much happens in the world of politics it's hard to cram it all into 8 minutes, but the Daily Show gives a masterful performance. (By the way, 4 out of 8 ain't bad).

And then there was the rick roll of Jon Stewart. For those of you who always wanted to know what it would be like to see Jon Stewart bare his "Britney" this is for you. WARNING: This image may be seared into your brain in a way that you never thought possible.

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